Rest Within Me (Poem from the Holy Darkness)!

I've been dancing
In and around 
My wound.

There is a deep despair
Heartache
Yearning
Burning 
In the depths
Of my Heart and womb.

A pressure
Searching
Aching
for exact precision

If it's not "right"
I might die.

Constantly tracking
Sniffing
Listening
Oh So Closely

To a Sent
That is so
Mysterious

My mind
Wants to Taste it
To understand it
To pin point it
And describe it 
To you so Badly
That it begins to Hurt.

Physical pain
Begins to seep in
Flood
And build in my Body.

The tension
and Tightness
Consumes me.

The pain begins
To crack me 
Open.

My armor
is So tight
It no longer
Fits.

My masks
Have holes in them
Where piercing
Light
Is starting to
Shine through.

I feel the Presence of God.
As I sink deeper 
Into my Experience.
​
Divine Presence
Lives
Here.

Can I allow 
Myself to be Fully
Here?

Frozen in the Moment.

The Holy Darkness.

A Silence So Defining
I am the Only One
Who can Hear it.

I am the Only One
Who exists Here.

As I arrive Here
My mind finally
Releases the Reins

I take a Deep Breath
I let out a Sigh.

I feel Welcomed Here.

My muscles 
Begin to erupt
Into a delightful Cry.

"Thank God."

A moment
I want to STAY in
Seep in
Relish in

I Slow Down
My breath.

I wiggle my Body
To create Space
To Receive More.

I witness my Mind
As it attempts
To predict
What's next.

There is nothing
To do Here.

I sink deeper.

I give myself
To the Void 
Of ALL creation.

I rest.

I pop out
As Real Life
Awakens me.

Disappointment
Frustration
Sadness
Begin to Bubble.

My Body
Begins to
Contract.

This time "I" offer MY Presence.

I offer MySelf.

My Heart
Is open
More whole
Fully devoted

My wound is Holy.

Old Stories
Old familiar pains
Begin to
Reveal themselves>

I smile
Look them deep in the eyes
And honor them.

I want to Be Here
With You.
I am not going anywhere.

I invite
Them closer.
I invite them
​To rest within me.